Gormott Monster Rescue
by DeraldSny
Summary: Humorous one-shot. When Rex, Zeke, and Nia fall into a trap set by bounty hunters, Wulfric uses an unorthodox tactic to save them from their situation...


And now for something completely different from my usual fare... a Xenoblade Chronicles 2 story! Enjoy!

ON WITH THE SHOW!

Gormott Monster Rescue

A Xenoblade Chronicles 2 Fan Fiction

by Derald Snyder

The Gormott Titan.

A mostly undeveloped Titan populated by all sorts of wild creatures, most of which were no threat to any half-competent Drivers passing through. Of course, there were exceptions, such as the Unique Monster known as Territorial Robart, which could quickly end the life of any unlucky amateur Driver that happened to wander into it's line of sight. But again, most recognized the creature and kept a safe distance- it didn't usually attack unless provoked.

Other than him, however, there wasn't much for a competent Driver to fear... except, of course, other Drivers, especially if you had a price on your head.

Case in point...

"Rrrrrrghh!" Rex growled in frustration as he strained against the ropes of the anti-ether net that he and his Blades had been caught in, to no avail. "How could we have fallen for something like this?!"

"It's all Shellhead's fault, for chargin' ahead like a maniac!" Nia said as she and Dromarch struggled in their own net.

 _"Mine?!"_ Zeke gasped. "How was the Zekenator supposed to know these low-level Drivers would resort to such under-handed tactics?!"

"My prince, please get your elbow out my face!" Pandoria grunted.

"Ugh, if only I had been in control instead of Pyra, my Foresight would've seen this coming!" Mythra complained, hearing her sister's voice apologizing in her head.

"Well, I'm sure Morag woulda seen this coming, had she been with us at the time!" Nia pointed out. Indeed, the Special Inquisitor had elected to stay in Torigoth for the time being, to ensure the Ardinian soldiers were doing their job properly. As for Tora, he'd stopped back home to do some maintenance on his artificial Blade Poppi, who would have been immune to anti-ether nets.

"Bwahahaha!" laughed one of their captors. "So much for the so-called mighty Aegis Driver! Seems you were nothin' but a kid after all!"

"Yeah, once we turn you lot in for the bounty, we'll be famous!" his partner added jovially.

"Bounty?! What a farce! You cannot put a price on the Zekenator's head!" Zeke protested.

"How 'bout you stop complainin' and start figuring 'ow to get us out of this mess?!" Nia hissed.

"Actually, I might have an idea," stated Wulfric, who was with Rex. "If Mythra could stop her squirming for a moment..."

"...This had better be good, Wulfric," the blonde Aegis sighed as she forced herself to remain still.

"Whatcha gonna do?" one of the enemy Drivers taunted. "Cry for Momma?"

"Not exactly..." the demonic-looking Blade said as he cleared his throat, before letting loose with what sounded like a low-pitched mournful wail.

"What's that, some sort of distress call?" Mythra grunted.

"Exactly," Wulfric confirmed. "After all, monsters are not affected by anti-ether nets..." Just then a bunch of gorilla-like Gogols appeared from over the nearby hill.

"Gogols? What a joke!" the other Driver scoffed, drawing his weapon. "We can take 'em easy!"

"But can you take that one?" Wulfric pondered, as a much larger Gogol with red fur joined the group.

"W-wait a tick..." the first Driver's eyes went wide. "A-ain't that... _Territorial Robart?!"_

Indeed it was, as Wulfric repeated his distress wail, the Unique Monster roaring in rage as it beat it's chest, before charging down the hill with it's fellow monsters...

"ARCHITECT HELP US!" The two Drivers cried in terror, as they and their Blades clung to each other...

 _*A short time later...*_

"Well, that wasn't exactly what I 'ad in mind for a rescue, but I'll take it," sighed Nia as she stretched. She and her companions were now free, the enemy Drivers/Blades now the ones wrapped up in their own anti-ether nets.

"I forgot Wulfric knew how to talk to monsters," Rex admitted as he and Mythra worked out the kinks in their bodies.

"W-well, maybe Wulfric could tell this one not ta eat me?!" Zeke stuttered, Pandoria hiding behind him as Territorial Robart gave them the eye.

"Yeah, maybe you could tell 'em they did a right good job and send 'em on their way, yeah?" Rex suggested to his Blade.

"Of course," the monstrous Blade nodded, clearing his throat before beginning to address the gathered monsters in hoots, grunts and howls, which translated something like this:

 _"Robart and Gogols, thou hast done well to assist us."_

 _"Thouest may now take thy rest,"_

 _"But I should enjoin thee to stay and observe,"_

 _"At how Leaf Camill doth dispose of these villains."_

The Gogols and Robart, at Wulfric's suggestion, gathered in a rough semicircle as said Camill slowly walked up to the trapped bounty hunters.

"Ooooh, I cannae wait to see _this!"_ Nia said with a sadisitic grin.

"Me neither," Mythra agreed with a similar smile, ignoring Prya's complaining that this was going a little too far.

"Wh-what's it g-gonna do...?" grunted one of the Drivers as Leaf Camill stopped in front of them, before turning around...

... and lifting up one of it's hind legs...

 **"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"**

~*Fin*~

Full disclosure: This story was inspired by a similar scene from the live-action comedy 'George of the Jungle'. Anyway, hope you got a laugh! XD


End file.
